what to say when scattering mums ashes

Nothing can prepare you for the passing on of a mother. There are funeral costs to work out, other family members to support, and many important decisions to make after your loss. And, if you opt for cremation, scattering the ashes can be a beautiful and cherished moment for loved ones to share while honouring the deceased.

An important decision you’ll have to make is what to say when scattering mum’s ashes. This moment can seem like a lot of pressure, but we want to start by saying there’s no right or wrong thing to say when scattering your mum’s ashes. Whatever you feel comfortable saying or not saying is perfectly fine. That being said, there are several ideas and tips for what to say when scattering mum’s ashes. From meaningful to funny, religious to secular, as well as classic phrases, you’ll be spoilt for choice. So whether you’re looking for inspiration or want to confirm whether your speech is okay, keep reading!

Before we get into the specific things you can say at the scattering ceremony, let’s begin with the general idea of the type of things you can say:

• Say a prayer
• Read a Bible verse
• Share a favourite quote
• Give a eulogy
• Say nothing

Clearly, there are many directions you can take. And, with a bit of planning, you’ll surely find the right words to say at such a crucial time.

Prayers for Scattering Ashes

People of all religions practice prayers to give them the strength to face every situation in life. And this includes bringing comfort and peace during such a difficult time of mourning mum’s death. You can pray spontaneously, ask a religious leader to do it, or use one of the known prayers. If you’re a Christian, The Lord’s Prayer is always a good option. Alternatively, you could say the Irish Funeral Prayer or the Christian Prayer for the Dead.

If you’re looking for something more concrete, perhaps you could recite Bible passages that talk about loss and healing or simply find uplifting readings. Psalm 23:4 is a good choice; it talks about how the Lord is there throughout the journey, even when moving through the darkest valley. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 is another good choice. This passage reminds us that in God’s order, there’s a time for everything, ‘…a time to be born and a time to die….’ This helps us bear the sorrow we feel as we face the fact that there’s a time for good times and bad times.

Poems for Scattering Ashes

A poem can say what mere words cannot. So, honour your late mum as you scatter her ashes by choosing an appropriate and meaningful memorial poem. Here are some popular funeral poems for you to consider:

An Irish Blessing

“May the road rise up to meet you.

May the wind be always at your back.

May the sun shine warm upon your face.

May the rains fall soft upon your fields.

And until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of his hand.”

Ashes to Ashes

Many assume the phrase “ashes to ashes, dust to dust” comes directly from the Bible. But while the Bible inspired it, it’s actually written in the Book of Common Prayer. It reminds us that everything that has life will one day come to an end.

“Let Me Go” by Christina Rossetti

This is a short but uplifting poem about saying goodbye to a loved one. The speaker is deceased, talking with those she left behind to give them comfort. In the end, she says, “When you are lonely and sick at heart, Go to the friends we know, And bury your sorrow in doing good deeds; Miss me, but let me go.”

We have an ever growing list of mother funeral poems that our readers continue to contribute, I hope they are of some help and inspiration.

Memorial Quotes for Scattering Ashes

Are you feeling stuck thinking of your own words? Sharing relatable quotes when scattering mum’s ashes is another excellent way of summing up how you feel about their passing. Quotes are simple words that carry heavy meanings, and here are some of the famous quotes that can apply to a scattering of ashes ceremony:

 “To us, the ashes of our ancestors are sacred. And their resting place is hallowed ground.” –Chief Seattle.

This quote reminds you of the sanctity of the area where you’re scattering your mum’s ashes. Carefully consider that it’s their final resting place as you choose where to scatter. 

“Lives are like rivers: Eventually, they go where they must. Not where we want them to.” –Richard Russo.

You didn’t want your mum to pass away. But, unfortunately, we all have no control over the death of a loved one. This quote encourages you to accept the fact even as you grieve the loss of your dearly beloved mother.

“Every man’s life ends the same way. It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another.” –Ernest Hemingway.

“Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely.” –Buddha

This quote provides comfort that your loved one lived a brave life. And although they faced many battles and situations, they came out stronger

“Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.” – Amelia Josephine Burr

Was your mother social and full of life? This quote would be perfect when scattering their ashes.

“In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” –Abraham Lincoln.

It can be particularly difficult if your mother passes away during the prime of her life. But if they lived their short life to the fullest, this quote can bring comfort and help lessen the pain.

Give a Eulogy, Personal Story, or Speech

Another way to honour your mother’s memory is to eulogize them in a speech during the scattering ceremony. Again, you should prepare this ahead of time and remember to keep it brief but impactful.

By reading the details and life history of the deceased, you’re reminding guests that although your dearly departed mother has been reduced to ashes, they played a significant role in your life and that of society.

You can also reminisce with those in attendance of the scattering ceremony. Whether it’s a funny or serious memory, recall a precious moment(s) between you and your mum to set the mood you want for scattering the ashes.

If you have been given the honour of speaking, we have provided some helpful tips to create a personal eulogy for your mother.

Say Nothing

Sometimes there isn’t much to say, don’t fret. You can have a moment of silence in honour of your mum. This allows everyone present to pause and use the moment to fill themselves with feelings or memories of the deceased.

Funerals are sombre moments where you may lack words to say since you’re overwhelmed with emotions. It’s okay to have a moment of silence; however, if you choose to speak during the scattering ceremony, here are a few tips to help you find the right words:

Consider her faith and personality

If your mother was very religious, perhaps saying a prayer or reciting Bible verses will be a great way of honouring them.

Write out what you want to say

It’s easy to forget or even lack words to say at the scattering ceremony as you’ll be overwhelmed with emotions. So have your speech written down even if you don’t end up using it.

Practice your speech

Practising what you’ll say during the scattering ceremony and preparing yourself for the moment is very important. Whether it’s a poem, quote, prayer, or a heartfelt statement, try to read it out or tell it to someone else and determine if it sounds right for the moment.

Keep it simple

The ashes scattering ceremony is one of those times when less is more.

Speak from the heart

There’s no right or wrong thing to say, just make it heartfelt and be true to your emotions as you speak.

Keep it dignified

While it’s okay to share a funny story, remember that this is an important occasion, and whatever you say should honour your mother’s memory.

It’s hard to accept the loss of a mother and even harder to say goodbye to her for good. Knowing what to say when scattering their ashes can feel difficult and overwhelming. We hope that this guide will help you get the right words, whether through a eulogy, prayer, poem, quote, or reminiscing. You can even combine these ideas to craft a unique and perfect statement to say your final goodbye. With that being said, avoid too much pressure. We’re sure whatever you say will be right for the moment. What’s most important is you take care of yourself gather all your strength to overcome this difficult moment.